What happens at a Jewish Funeral?

In Jewish tradition, the embrace of life is accompanied by an acceptance of the inevitability of death. Unlike some other faiths, Judaism doesn't prescribe a specific afterlife. Instead, it holds beliefs in the immortality of the soul, the concept of the World to Come, and the eventual resurrection of the dead. However, it is understood that leading an honourable life can positively influence the soul's journey after death.

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These beliefs hold significant importance in Orthodox and Conservative Jewish communities, although some traditional practices have undergone adaptations within Reform Judaism.

Body Preparation

According to Jewish law, the deceased is ritually washed (Tahara) but not embalmed, and then dressed in a simple burial shroud. This sacred task is overseen by a group known as the Chevra Kadisha, comprising both men and women, who stay with the body until burial to ensure adherence to Jewish funeral customs. Men often wear a prayer shawl (‘tallit’) during this process.

Regarding cremation, attitudes vary across different branches of Judaism. Orthodox and Conservative Jews typically prohibit cremation, advocating instead for intact burial, while Reform Jews may accept cremation, a practice gaining popularity. However, organ donation is generally accepted across all Jewish denominations due to its potential to save lives.

Jewish Funeral Customs

A traditional Jewish funeral usually occurs within 24 hours of death, out of respect for the departed. However, contemporary services may be scheduled later to accommodate the attendance of friends and family. Public viewing of the deceased is not customary.

Funerals can be held in various locations, including synagogues, funeral homes, or gravesides. The deceased is laid to rest in a simple, unadorned casket, typically crafted from wood or pine, designed to facilitate natural decomposition.

A typical Jewish funeral service may include:

  1. Gathering of mourners

  2. Keriah (tearing of a black ribbon)

  3. Entry into the chapel

  4. Opening remarks and prayers

  5. Eulogy

  6. Departure of the deceased's family from the chapel

  7. Transfer of the casket from the chapel

  8. Funeral procession to the cemetery

At the graveside, the ceremony generally involves:

  1. Placing the casket by the grave

  2. Recital of prayers and lowering of the casket

  3. Graveside ceremony and further prayers

  4. Recitation of the Mourner’s Kaddish

  5. Covering the casket with earth

A Jewish funeral typically lasts around 20 to 60 minutes.

Post-Funeral Customs

After the burial, it's customary for the bereaved family to host a reception either at a synagogue or at their home. During the mourning period, a candle is lit on the first day and left burning for a week.

The Mourning Period

The initial seven days following the funeral, known as ‘shiva’ (meaning ‘seven’), are dedicated to mourning. During this time, family members receive visitors at home, recite the Mourner’s Kaddish, and contemplate their loss. Personal grooming and intimacy are avoided as a symbol of grief and sacrifice. Mirrors may be covered to discourage vanity.

Following shiva, a secondary mourning period (‘shloshim’) extends for 30 days, during which daily prayers and hymns are observed. For some families, mourning practices may continue for up to a year.

On the anniversary of the death, a candle is lit for 24 hours in remembrance, a ritual known as Yahrzeit.

Attire for a Jewish Funeral

Guests are expected to dress modestly, avoiding revealing attire such as short skirts or sleeves. Male attendees typically wear jackets and ties, with a yarmulke as a head covering, while women opt for conservative clothing without necessarily covering their heads. Immediate family members may wear a black ribbon, which is later cut as a symbol of mourning and worn throughout the shiva period.

Etiquette on Sending Condolences

While there isn't a specific script for mourners to follow during a Jewish funeral, offering condolences and sympathy to the bereaved family is always appreciated. The funeral service primarily consists of prayers, hymns, and religious readings.

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